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If you had unsuccessful relationship with your partner, then probably your next relations are almost the same. The same feelings overwhelm you again such as feeling of deprivation, loneliness, indignation, despair, at your wits’ end.Imagine that other people treated you in a certain way in the past, for example: they criticized you, did not accept you, offended and mocked at you, got you involved in conflict situations. Even though you move to live into a new place you will face the same problems again.
In some cases, you may be often unemployed. As if there is always something that stands in your way. It seems that things get better for a while and then get worse again. As if evil power plays with you: providing you with a little bit of what you love and then take it away from your hands again.
What is going on…? You start thinking to yourself “Why that happens to me again? What is wrong?”
You blame it on the fate and people around you. You start to think that you have no luck, your life was meant to be like that, or you are just ill-fated person.
In this way you form firm beliefs in your mind and you start to attract more people and situations that verify and confirm your beliefs over and over again.
As if you are in a deadlock situation and there is no way out of it.
No matter what you do and what you try to change, events would follow the old scenario.
That makes you think that something with you is wrong. There is something that stays inside you no matter where you go.
It is said that if a situation happens repeatedly, you should learn your lesson from it. It will repeat over and over again for as long as you learn your lesson. This may provoke resistance inside yourself and you ask yourself – “Why should I learn my lesson as if I were a bad child? Why should I suffer, why I am punished, what should I repay?”
In fact those stories happen to you not because of your unlucky fate or influence of evil powers, nor because you are an ill-fated person, or because you did something wrong and you have to be punished for it now.
Those stories are not punishment, nor the crucifix, you have to bring on your back.
The truth is that those stories are ordered by you and you go through them in the same way as you ordered them.
I know that it is something that one can hardly accept as real.
Of course, you do that subconsciously. How this happens?
Paradox of intention
Subconsciously, you create an intention, that does not acts on your favor. That is a paradox of intention.
Because of the paradox of intention, you alienate yourself from what you desperately strive for and attract exactly what you actively do NOT want.
Then why it happens that you drive back the things that you want to have in your life? In fact the stronger you want to achieve something the easier it should be to get it. That is so, is not it?
Firstly, lets make it clear that there is a difference between your wish and your need and you may confuse them.
They may look like the same thing but your wish inspires you, fills you with joy and leads you ahead without forcing you to do something. Pure wish is not related to negative feelings and hurting, it liberates you and it does not require achieving what you want at every price. Pure wish makes you feel as if you already have what you desire and now you enjoy every stage of its achievement and realization.
We are concentrated on the happiness and the thrills of joy.
In this way your wish turns into intention, which has the power to reorganize your situation and everything happens smoothly, of its own will.
On the other had, your need puts pressure on you, fills you with fear, despair, feeling of dead-lock, urgency. All your attention is paid to those negative feelings.
Thus, your attention turns into intention and attracts even more situations that make you feel at your wits’ end.
In all cases, every intention that is supported by strong emotions comes true.
Thus your firm wish to achieve your goal will come true if it is supported by positive emotions such as joy, excitement, passion and love.
Also the same principle is valid when you wish something NOT to happen. It comes true if it is supported by fear because fear is much stronger emotion and enforces processes faster.
Concentration of your attention on something + strong emotions = realization
Your attention is paid only to your goal when you feel pure wish, as if you already achieved what you want. On the other hand when you feel need to have something your attention is paid to the lack of it.
It turns out that you should not need anything in order to get it…?
But in case you do not need it, then why you should get it and use it for?
Here comes the most important moment, which is the hardest to be understood and applied.
Can you wish something without feeling need of having it? Can you concentrate on the joy when you are numb with fear, despair and what you want is essential to your life?
Authors usually advise you to change your focus and move it from the lack of something to all that you already have got and feel grateful for it.
You see only the lack right at that moment. It is almost impossible to redirect your attention to something else that makes you feel excited. It is hard to feel joy and happiness when you are deeply scared and despaired.
What is the solution? How to find the way out of this situation?
Refusal is the only outcome, no matter how paradoxical it may sound.
Having in mind my own experience, I know that I get what I want when I reject it and stop to desperately strive for it. Of course that does not mean to totally reject your wish but to refuse to chase it in a maniacal way. Rejection liberates you from getting attached to the need of receiving it at every cost. Thus there is no need to struggle for it.
Then you accept the situation the way it is.
That does not mean that you reconcile with it. It means that you accept it. That is quite liberating and you are not attached to what you want.
Then you are liberated from the need to have what you strive for. Thus spontaneously you pay attention to other good things and you see that the situation is not that bad. There are too many nice things around you that may make you happy but you could not see them earlier because of your desperate wish to get something else. Naturally, you can start to enjoy what you already have.
Your wish is released from the compulsion. Moreover you have already added positive emotions that are necessary. And unexpectedly there is a chance and everything that you wish comes true.
That is so because the energy of your wish is still kept inside you. The Universe has not “forgotten” your order and wish to it, you just allowed it to happen this time.
Interpretation
Very often your interpretation is the reason for repeatedly going through the same stories in your life.
If you went through suffering in the past that left pain and negative feelings inside yourself, then you start to interpret everything that happens to you in accordance with that negative experience.
For example, your beloved broke up with you because of somebody else and that left deep pain in your subconscious mind. Now you try to have a new relationship and you see that your new partner speaks to somebody else. Of course the situation is insignificant and harmless but it makes you feel the same pain. You question yourself – “hm, here comes the same story and he will prefer and choose to be together with the other person again”. That makes you feel jealous and angry and you react in inadequate way. You start to scold at each other, to follow him, to put the guilt on him. In the end that may cause a repetition of the same story and you will be abandoned once again. You are the reason why things to happen in a similar way.
What is the solution and how to get out of that situation?
You should not forget that you interpret everything that happens to you. You should consider if another person causes you pain or make you remember about it?
Interpretation does not allow you to see the real way things are. It distorts the truth.
The pain is not inside you. When you have not let it go and not released the negative feelings in the past, they remain deep inside yourself and are projected in what happens to you.
That is why it is very important to completely live through all that happens to you, to accept it and let it go in order not to carry it in the present.
Beliefs
Your past experience forms your beliefs. You start to believe that you are successful or ill-fated person, victim or winner in accordance with what happened to you in the past. Your beliefs make you behave and think in a certain way. Your energy is radiated in a relative way and it is felt by other people.
You attract what you radiate. If you accept that something is true for yourself, then it becomes reality. Your beliefs create and program everything that happens to you.
Fortunately, those beliefs can be changed. The easiest way is to use affirmations and visualization.
Try to write down on a piece of paper a list of all your beliefs on your relations, welfare, yourself and other problematic spheres of your life. You should write down everything that you can think of and you will be really surprised by the negative beliefs you already have.
How you can achieve success when you are ready and prepared to face failure?
How you could change something when you radiate the same energy?
Nothing will change unless you take measure to change yourself.
Now you should write down what you want to happen to you. Let it be your list of affirmations which you will turn into your new beliefs.
You should remember that even the slightest change in your way of thinking would also affect the energy that you radiate, thus it will also change everything that you attract in life.
Please feel free to share your opinion and comments. Do you think that some stories in your life happen repeatedly? For example, your relationships or identical situations and why do you think so?
Author: Rosica- www.sebepoznanie.com
Translation: Vanya Osmanlieva www.VirtualAssistants.bg
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